Have You Lost Yourself In Your Relationship

Is your relationship joyful? If not, what do you need to change to make it

Many women who are competent and switched-on, are still waking up to
realise they have lost themselves in their relationship yet again.

Having worked with many women who are in relationship or single, over the
past 10 years as a Empowerment Coach, I have seen time and time again, how
little women really honour and cherish themselves, and how their current or
past relationship reflects this.

Many women today do not acknowledge or understand their true essence of who
they are.

Women don’t know how to be in their own true power.

Even with all the awareness and campaigns of women rising up over the last
50 or so years, there still resides a certain unconscious shame to be in a
female body.

Are you one of many women regardless of success in many other areas of
life, still feel undervalued and unappreciated when it comes to your
intimate love relationship?

Women have been conditioned to believe they are ‘less than’ the men around
them. Often the reason for this is the attitude and actions of parents,
grandparents and teachers greatly influences the thoughts and shapes the
beliefs and outlook of the young girl.

In a comprehensive study of children and their parents, released by the
World Health Organization and Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public
Health, it was concluded, when it comes to learning what it means to be a
girl or a boy, the universal thinking prevails: Girls are weak and boys are

Along the lines of this attitude, Robert Blum who led the study, found that
a very damaging message to girls is their body must be kept safe, by how
they dress and act, and failure to do so, means it is their fault if any
untoward action happens to them.

I know for myself, that I was brought up to believe it was a female’s role
to be a ‘help-meet’ to her husband. Firstly, there was an underlying
presumption that I was to get married. Then the second presumption was, my
husband was to be the main financial provider. The third presumption was it
my job to help him to be all and achieve all he could do, and I was to put
myself second.

How these underlying attitudes play out, often sees women tending to put
their relationship needs first and their own personal desires and needs
second. She may be, very successful in her business or career, and quite
independent financially, or she could be completely or partly dependent on
her partner for financial support. Either way, in her relationship, she has
put herself second, thus losing touch with her own needs and desires.

If you are a woman who feels burnt out, exhausted and don’t know who you
are anymore in your relationship, then here’s some questions to ask

Where have you been putting your partner first at all cost to your own
emotional wellbeing?

Where are you saying ‘no’ to yourself, that you believe you cannot do?

What parts of your relationship have been draining you?

How have you been seeking approval from your partner? (not wanting to upset

What parts of yourself have you felt you have lost, or not yet explored or

When you feel angry and resentful towards you partner… this is your big red
flag! Your true self is speaking to you, trying to bring into your
awareness to see where you have been depleting yourself.

This inner truth can be rather confronting, but to move forward, it needs
to be addressed.

Are you giving your power away?

To find out, download our Checklist – The 9 Archetypes of Your Inner Power.